Your Golf Swing is Decided in the Womb

Worldwide research has proven that obesity starts in the womb. Yes, it's all your mother's fault that you're a fat slob.
After discovering this, the researchers then went on to a far more important subject - could that wicked slice or duck-hook have also been ingrained whilst in the womb?
And the resounding answer is - yes! That lousy swing is all the fault of your mother, and the way she vacuumed.
New Zealand prenatal researchers studied 200 golfers and their mothers, focusing on housework. While other chores also had an effect on the child's golf, (those whose mothers packed the dishwasher methodically produced golfers who always put their clubs in their bags in numerical order), vacuuming proved to have the greatest effect.
Did she carefully go around all the furniture? If so, she'll have a child who has a solid swing and seldom goes off the fairway.
Did she crash into the table and chair legs? If so, that child will have a wild swing and spend all their time in the trees.
Then came the most vital piece of research. Did she use straight sweeps or curving motions? Those who predominantly curved to the left (and were right-handed) produced golfers who hooked, while those who went to the right (and were right-handed) produced slicers.
Those who hoped to overcome the effects by employing random motions with both hands produced the worst-afflicted offspring of all - they played croquet.
How can we ensure that this golfing malady is not passed on to future generations? It was suggested that all vacuum cleaners come with a sticker saying: “Vacuuming during pregnancy, even in small quantities, can have grave/serious consequences on the golf swing of the baby.”
As you'd expect, vacuum manufacturers refused to contemplate such a measure, pointing out that not every child would want to be a golfer. 
"Well of course they won't," pointed out the chief researcher, "thanks to your implement blighting their young lives." 
Unfortunately, the vacuum manufacturers are as influential as Sky City Casino lobbyists, so the government refused to make the warning stickers mandatory.
Fortunately, the researchers asked Ms Kallas-Way to help out.
"Simple," she said, "make sure the husband/father/partner does the vacuuming."